How I Help Couples Feel Comfortable in Front of the Camera

If there's one thing I hear more than anything else before a shoot, it's some version of this: 

"We’re not really photo people." "I never know what to do with my hands." "We're really awkward in front of a camera."

I hear you, but that’s also exactly why we’re going to get along. Because my approach to photographing couples has very little to do with posing, directing, or producing the perfect shot. It has everything to do with making you feel so at ease that the camera becomes an afterthought. The photos that come from that place are always the most honest. And honest is always the most beautiful. 

Here's how I make that happen. 

It Starts Long Before the Day

By the time we meet in person, we've already spent weeks and sometimes even months getting to know each other. I'm in my clients' inboxes and DMs a lot. Questions, ideas, timeline details, random check-ins. And a lot of my couples follow me on Instagram before our shoot, which I love, because my stories aren’t as much about photography as they are about me. What I'm eating, what I'm reading, where I'm wandering on my days off, and what I actually think about things. 

Getting to know me as a person helps my clients connect with me before they even meet me, and that really helps them realize I'm really just like them, not a scary photographer or complete stranger.

The Camera Stays Hidden Until We've Said Hello

Something I’m very deliberate about is never showing up for a session with my camera already out (unless it’s a surprise proposal, of course). 

Instead, I like to meet them in the parking lot, introduce myself first, then walk and talk with them as we head out to start taking photos. Because if I arrive looking like I'm ready to shoot, the instinct is to immediately start performing, and that's exactly what I want to avoid. By the time I finally bring my camera out, everyone is already relaxed.

"Pretend I'm Not Here" 

The number-one saying I use for any session, whether it is an elopement, a surprise proposal, or a couples session, is to simply pretend I’m not even there. I love giving my couples space to just be with each other, talk, laugh, and move naturally while I work around them. It is particularly exciting right after a proposal, when you can laugh about any suspicions or the secret spot the ring was stashed in.

Throughout a session, I'll offer gentle prompts, like suggesting a new spot or asking you to sit, stand, walk, or lean into each other, but how you interpret those is entirely up to you. I'm not looking for a specific shape or a specific expression. I'm looking for the moment when you stop thinking about me and start thinking about each other. 

I also start the session a ways away to give you space, then move closer as the session progresses. By the time I'm close enough for the more intimate shots, you've usually stopped thinking about me entirely. 

However, there are times this strategy doesn’t work. Body language tells me everything. A little stiffness, an unsure glance, the sense that someone is waiting to be told what to do. When I pick up on that, I step in. I ask questions. How's your trip been? Where did you eat last night? Are you going on a honeymoon? Anything to get you talking and out of your own head. 

Couples often worry they're doing something wrong when I give them freedom during portraits. They’re definitely not, but I know that fear, and I never want anyone to feel abandoned or directionless. The guidance is always there when you need it. I just try not to force it when you don't. 

The Universe I'm Here to Create

There's a deeper reason behind all of this. I believe every session is an opportunity to create a universe — a small, protected space where the only thing that exists is you and the person beside you. Where the outside world falls away completely. Where what's captured in those images is sheltered, permanent, and entirely real. 

That's not just how I describe my work. It's genuinely how I approach every session, because what I’m photographing isn’t a photoshoot. It's just two people, in love, in a beautiful place. And those are always the images that last. 

The Right Energy Is Everything 

Every couple brings a different energy to a shoot. Some are bubbly and outgoing, while others are quieter and more reserved.  What I've learned is that my job is to follow your lead — to match where you are rather than pulling you somewhere else. If I show up with high energy to a couple who are naturally calm and quiet, it can feel jarring, like we're out of sync, and vice versa.

This is why it’s also important that I chat with my clients beforehand, so I can learn more about their personalities before meeting. Sometimes they let me know ahead of time that they're nervous about taking photos, so I make sure to offer as much support and guidance during their shoot as I can, at least at the beginning. 

The other thing energy does is signal confidence. The energy I bring lets them know I'm confident they're doing exactly what they should be doing in front of the camera, which helps them relax and capture their most genuine photos. 

My Goal Is Always the Same 

I want you to look back at your photos and see yourselves, and not a posed, performative version of you. That doesn't happen by accident. It happens because of every small, intentional thing that happens before and during your session.

You don’t need to be photogenic! You just need to show up, and I’ll take care of the rest.

Thinking about eloping in Maine or Acadia and wondering if you'll feel comfortable in front of the camera? I'd love to connect. Take a look at all the details of my Maine elopement packages here, and let’s start crafting your story.